Face Features

When Jaiden was still in my tummy the 3D sonograph result seemed to show that he would really look like his papa (http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1327238424509&set=a.1327230904321.2048534.1337389223) but others would say that his nose would be similar to mine (http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=1327238304506&set=a.1327230904321.2048534.1337389223). When he got out everything came to reality (http://picasaweb.google.com/gemmacabildo/JaidenSArrival?authkey=Gv1sRgCKnWlq-V9-KTLw#5556102288759320354).

No doubt for sure that Jaiden got the shape of his face, his chin, lips and ears from his papa. I believe his nose is mine :) though Ariel really had a hard time and it really took him so much to realize it. His eyes are round and I think mine is too (http://picasaweb.google.com/gemmacabildo/10mosPreggyMe?authkey=Gv1sRgCMPy75_k-82ScQ#5556104172569551698). hehehheheh, Jaiden's pediatrician was my kakampi (she took my side). His eyes will take a moon shape (or smiles also) when he will give a hearty smile (http://picasaweb.google.com/gemmacabildo/SmilingEyes?authkey=Gv1sRgCPeWko3Qsp-rigE#5556106059886247730).

All the above comparisons are just based on the majority's observation but nothing beats yours.
What do you think?

Brainy Baby

When Jaiden was still about to be five months old he already showed interests in watching t.v. intently. So I looked for learning CDs/DVDs to put his liking to use. As I searched for it I found out that Brainy Baby's learning DVDs are good but their minimum or lowest age (qualified to watch) DVDs is from six months old. Hence, it didn't fit Jaiden's age. Somehow I thought that Brainy Baby's age bracketing was just an ideal one and I was thinking that who cares as long as my baby would enjoy it then why not buy! So I bought Brainy Baby Peek-a-Boo. True enough I don't regret it. Jaiden enjoyed it at his early age of four months yet he'll still be six months this coming 28th of December.

The pictures (first two were taken last Dec.27, 2010, one day before he turns six months while the latter pic was taken ahead than the first two) were taken during his usual Brainy Baby Peek-a-Boo watching sessions. An enjoyment in his face meant that he was watching the portion were a toddler sings to his papa Twinkle Twinkle Little Star or a mother sings to her baby The Wheels on the Bus. And yes! that is how he places his feet when he watches Brainy Baby.

Christmas with Family

It was our first Christmas Eve as a family and with our extended family. That was the highest number of persons we have ever gathered on Christmas Eve. It was no doubt a celebration also of our baby's first Christmas. Thank you Lord for our ultimate Christmas gift. Merry Christmas!

Little Santa

Last Dec.12, 2010 I made sure that Christmas wouldn't pass without my baby's first Christmas attire pictorial other than buying santa's cap wouldn't be put to waste. So my sis, Inday Arni took several shots to get a good one of my ever moving baby and this is one of those. Though little bulging tummy is out but Santa's is really the true big one. hehehehehhe.... Josh should also be in the pictorial to stabilize Jaiden as he is Jaiden's idol. :)

NO Change

Dec.16, 2010. I was pretty sure that carenderia has no change of my P500 for a seven-peso-utan and ten-peso-shrimp ball, so I bought a P50+ Kitkat cake in Fresco. It turned out that I had a lunch equivalent to that of a Jollibee meal wweeee!!!!! I was having second thought but didn't regret my decision as I had a healthy lunch and a very delicious dessert. Hence, this is what I may get to eat when I have NO Change!

Breastfeeding Jaiden

Inspired by the fact that breastmilk gives lots of health benefits, I already planned to breastfeed as long as I can our then most awaited bundle of joy. My doctor told me that the more the baby breast-feeds the more the milk would flow. So it was important then that as much as possible after delivery (that was last June 28, 2010) I would be able to breastfeed my baby. Unknown to us or we just didn't have an idea that a certain rule exists,the hospital doesn't allow rooming-in (having the newborn be stayed in the room you're in) so I had to visit my baby in the nursery.

I believe my baby was able to get my colostrum, a satisfying thought. I don't know why or it could be another test that God gave us when our baby was found positive of an infection. According to his pediatrician, he must had gotten it from me while I had conceived him but the infection just didn't manifest in me. So he had to stay in the ICU. For a week we never got tired of visiting him everyday and stayed for almost half of the day waiting for him to wake so he would get used to breastfeeding. It was also for my milk production to be stimulated. Gradually my milk came and at times leaked when he (my baby) wasn't able to took it. During his stay in the nursery, he was bottle-fed with a nipple that mimics close to that of a woman. So by this time he was already mixed-feed - bottle-feed and breastfeed.

Jaiden's first breastfeed at home wasn't good but I was glad that he still fed in me even though he was already bottle-feed much of the time in the nursery. However,I think my breast milk didn't satiate him because I nursed him from around three-thirty in the afternoon to around seven in the evening but still he didn't fall to deep sleep. He would wake up the moment I would put him to his crib. So we decided to bottle-fed him with a formula to complement my breast milk. This is what we did in his first two months. I breast-fed him much of the time. In fact, breastfeeding was what put him to goodnight sleep.

Going back to work after my two months maternity leave had made my baby be bottle-fed much of the time - now the opposite. So in order to at least have him a breast milk and to have my milk production continue I had to bring with me my breast pump paraphernalia. We had to buy dry ice for my pumped breast milk thereafter. My hubby has to carry the heavy dry ice inside the bucket to our office and bring it back home every other day (because it would take approximately two days to have the dry ice melt) for ice refill. Later on when I visited my OB for my dry cough check-up since I just can't buy any over the counter meds since I was lactating, I told her of our usual routine. She laughed when I told her that my husband and I just joked at each other asking how much ice candy have we sold (because the bucket that we had is the same with the one used for selling ice candy). I also told her that we spent twenty pesos every other other day for a week (so that made it P60/week) for the price of the dry ice (the one used in preserving fishes). She must had been moved by our situation that she was generous enough to gave me her three packs (500gms/pack) of gel ice (this is not an edible ice, just used for medicine cooling). So from then on, my hubby no longer carried a bucket of dry ice everyday but me carrying a one and a half kilo of gel-dry-ice (inside a pack-lunch bag) to be put later on in the ice bucket permanently (as of the moment) left in the office.

In the office, during lunch break I had to forgo my nap to pump. It was an amazing thing to know how a lactating breasts behaved. I learned that if I had much milk (when Jaiden didn't breastfeed much during wee hours) the moment the pumped breast begun expressing milk the other one (not pumped) would initially release a quite amount of milk just good enough to wet your bra (if you don't wear a breast pad). As usual the frugality in me came in. I put my leaked (milk) breast on a cover of the container to let the milk dripped in there thinking it would add to my certain ounces of painstakingly pumped breast milk. It would usually take approximately thirty minutes to get two ounces of milk (three ounces if Jaiden didn't breast-feed much during wee hours). Another pumping was done at about four thirty or five in the afternoon that would add up to a total of five to six ounces. Part of me was guilty for doing my second pumping during office hours but I reasoned to myself that I was just taking my equivalent snack or break time benefit. Doing just a couple of milk expressing in the office was good enough to have my breast milk production at bay. With this I could breastfeed Jaiden on wee hours which was really a convenience. I didn't have to wake up to prepare formula milk but just nursed him by my side. I could just breast-fed him half-awake.

Things changed when he was almost five months old. He didn't consider anymore going to goodnight sleep with me breastfeeding him. I think it was a gradual change for him without me noticing it. There were instances that we arrived late in the house and I wasn't able to nursed him to sleep instead he had already been bottle-fed by mama but during that time he still would breastfeed when he woke up on wee hours until the moment came when he stopped. At first I thought he didn't mean it and just didn't realize that he was already latching on my nipple. I would coerced him to latch after he would turn his head (for the second time) then sucked his thumb (a sign that he's hungry) but to no avail. That was then the first time I went downstairs to prepare formula milk. Oh! I was really astounded and was so sad because for the first time I felt that he could now live without my breast milk (what a silly thought) and my wee hours convenience was over. However, I think with his age he was already wise enough to understand that it 's an instant to feed in bottle than to latch,suck and wait for a while for the milk to flow.

Even though I knew that Jaiden can no longer be nursed, I still continued to pump in the office so that at least he would still have the breast-milk nutrients (even just a little) that would help his immune system at times when, God forbid, he would get sick. But then I noticed that I was just able to pump two ounces a day - a so little quantity which made me realized that my milk production has gradually decreases. This could be the reason why Jaiden wasn't patient enough because it would really took him long to take my breastmilk. Baby as he is, he doesn't have the perseverance. With this, I slowly realized that the time has come to wean.

Gradually, I had tried not expressing my milk from night time until the next whole day and had found out (in my breast pad) that no breastmilk leak had happened within the day. Hence, on December 15, 2010 I had officially stopped expressing my milk. Part of me felt sad because I had never realized that nursing my baby would end so soon. I had thought of ending it when he'll be six months though my hubby didn't want it to end that early (he was also thinking of the breast milk nutrients' benefit) but my baby Jaiden did. It never occurred to me that it'll be my baby who'll stop it early. I have always thought that it'll be me and even feared that when I would wean it wouldn't be that easy for my baby but I was very wrong. What can I do? but accept the fact that all good things come to end. On the positive side, I now won't have to bring a cumbersome bag of one and a half kilo of gel ice with only 5ounces of breast milk. It'll now be easy to go to the mall (after office hours). I now won't have to worry that my baby won't be able to sleep without me if ever it would be inevitable for me to go home early.

Though short, I would really treasure the bonding time my baby and I had during our breastfeeding sessions. Breastfeeding is such an awesome experience and I think is a memorable part of my journey as a mother. I'm glad I had tried my best and have given my baby breastmilk. It made me feel complete as a woman and as a mother. Hence, to first time expectant mothers out there, I advise you to do breastfeed no matter how short it will be. As the adage goes "breastmilk is still best for babies".


I also believe that breastfeeding is the second purpose why woman is created by God. Woman is capable of nurturing the by-product of procreation - the reason why God created woman in the first place. =) 

First Fall

Like most mother do, as much as possible I like to remember my baby's firsts moments. I take pictures and videos whenever possible but there are just baby's happy, sad or surprising moments that my camera isn't there to take it. What happened this morning is one of those.

Mama thought that Jaiden was still asleep(after a short awake and bonding with his papa he went back to sleep) called me up here in the office to inform about what Arni has done. It was just a brief talk. After which, mama heard Jaiden's shout cry that has awaken JOsh. She rushed upstairs and saw Jaiden lying in his tummy on the floor. Jaiden must've awaken and tried rolling and God knows what actually did happen. Jaiden immediately stopped crying the moment mama picked him up.

As I saw Jaiden on cam (installed in our house), he doesn't show any signs of physical hurting. He's back to his normal self - a very moving baby. I hope he is okay after his first fall - fingers crossed :).

A Christmas Present

You have not been conceptualize from the start.
He just suggested in you in passing.
Somehow he gave me the idea and made me think.

One day I accidentally bumped into someone's blog.
Reading much of her story and ideas made me realize
to revive my own.
Painstakingly, I searched my own and was so glad to
reread my posts.

I started posting even during illegal hours.
I managed to almost finished one in a day.
Almost since I knew that I have to do it on proper times.
Finish it at home but I can't because mama enjoyed playing Bejewelled.

It was then that I realized that I need to have you, to be my own..
Ever since when I was a child, writing has always been one of my passions.
So his suggestion is now a request waiting to be materialize.
I don't know if he regretted suggesting it but I think he didn't
'coz you're almost within my reach now.

Thank you Ga!
This has been my precious material gift so far.
I love you and Merry Christmas!

My Christmas Feelings

Of all the season in a year, I bet everyone is always excited with Christmas or so I think. For me excitement feeling has gradually change from "most to just okay".

Childhood or Elementary years. There was always that feeling that something nice was about to happen. I looked forward to classroom party, the exchanging of gifts, the Christmas vacation, the receiving and giving of gifts from friends, the opening of presents from mama and papa, the house party on the twenty-fourth with neighbors and relatives financially made possible through amot-amot (agreed amount of contribution to come up with a certain figure) or sometimes (but most of the time though) shouldered by our parents, the family bonding by going to the downtown departments stores in Colon, staying for a while in Plaza Independencia or going to the church, so on and so forth. I guess what mama said that Christmas is for children is true.

Highschool years. I was still excited. Excited for classroom party to happen. I would be able to wear my supposed lady-like outfit, sort of show off to my classmates that I'm blossoming and my figures as well (oh, shame on me..... ehehehhheeh) and to my crush as well (?). Still there was the neighborhood and relatives Christmas party (this was later part when my papa was with us already), the gift giving and receiving, etcetera. I guess the additional significant activity was attending the Simbang gabi (which I had never completed heheehee) and the midnight Christmas mass with my cousin Glenda and some company I already forgot. One thing for sure was I was with cousin, Glenda, who was always been my closest. As far as I can remember my family hadn't attended mass together ever since my papa went abroad. My mama I think, was too engrossed in her missing-my-papa emotion that she opted to sleep on the twenty-fourth to pass the merry occasion. I could just remember one Christmas eve after attending the mass that I arrived in our house so dark and silent because my mama and my sisters were already asleep. Our supposed noche buena food were already in the fridge. So I just slept after I tasted mama's fruit salad. That was just it, so simple and nothing merry happened. On the other hand, somehow I think, I was also excited that the year was about to end and that soon I'll be more grown-up then I can have a boyfriend already hahahahahahahah!!!!!!. Mama once told me that I can enter in our relationship when I would be in college but later on she took it back but I insisted and the rest is another story.

College years. I was just feeling that Christmas was just around the corner but there wasn't that much to be excited of. I gradually realized that Christmas was just indeed for a child. I missed my classroom party. You know how college life is, so independent. There's no party unless you and your friends organized one and I wasn't into a barkada (as usual) so I didn't have a party to attend. Oh, wait! There was a time in my freshmen year that my supposed barkada or block section friends headed by Brian organized a little party but I decided not to attend because I didn't have extra money to spare for the incidental expenses. So still no party for me. hehehehe...... but Brian was very good enough to head the group into giving me a Christmas card with their greetings written on it. It was very nice of them and thank you Brian! (even though I know our friendship will never be back to what we used to before because of my damn pride). Other than that, It was just enough for me to give greetings cards to my few dearest friends. I had my first time boyfriend then but as if none because both of us weren't allowed yet. So it was illegal to be seen together and later on our relationship ended in God's time (I believed it to be so). Later my second and last boyfriend came, so Christmas was just spent going out somewhere, sorry I forgot where we went (..heheheh) but for sure mall was part of it. This time my papa was already around with us, so we already had our noche buena and we were able to attend midnight Christmas mass together. That was fun then!

As I grow mature in life, Christmas excitement feeling has just become okay. Even the company Christmas party didn't made me excited. I think because of my job pressure I hadn't given much thought of Christmas. Spending Christmas with my family and my boyfriend (then husband) had just made my Christmas to be it. Life back then took a spiral turn when something happened to my sis, Jenny. The story is too long to tell. It was getting more serious (literally drama to put it) and challenging but with the arrival of Josh it then again was fun since there was now a child in the family. So whenever Christmas would arrive, Christmas feeling was then again just okay.

Married life came. This time Christmas excitement was I think no more? hhhmmmm..... let me think. Early part of this stage of my life I think I felt not excited of Christmas except that I enjoyed shopping for gifts and wrapping it. It gave you (and always has been) a nice feeling to give Christmas gifts. I was thankful to God for the blessings and specially for giving me my loving husband. My Pangga and I visited and ate Christmas foods prepared by our extended immediate families. On Christmas day (sponsored by us), we with our extended immediate family strolled the mall, ate in a restaurant and played in the game zone. My husband and I were just happy to see our nephew running around the mall. Our nephew then were the immediate direct receiver of our affection while we were desperately trying and waiting for our baby. I believe back then that every year was always an excitement of hoping that our baby was soon to come.

With much effort and deep prayers, our baby was born. This time I have never been happier and excited for Christmas. I just don't know. Shopping around for gifts has always been my activity but even this, it gives me more happiness than usual. I am excited to do my gift-wrapping coupled by the fact that I have to do it in hiding so that the recipient in our house won't be able to know. Maybe because I consider gift-giving as sort of being grateful to God for all the blessings He has showered on us and most especially thanking Him that we have now our little bundle of joy. Having our baby Jaiden is our ultimate Christmas gift from Him and the giving of gifts is my sort of return thank you to Him.

Even though our baby is just five months old this coming Christmas, I feel so excited and I think for our baby as well. Jaiden now very much enjoy watching the blinking Christmas lights in our yard and in our little Christmas tree but I hope he'll be able to surpass the blast sounds of fire crackers on Christmas eve. Oh! How I dread that moment to happen. I just hope he won't be traumatized by it. He now is very playful, so with him around there's much reason to be excited and happy this Christmas. Our Christmas then will be Merrier!

Oh! I think my Christmas gift is coming? Now this is also another good reason to be excited ! .... more blog (or so I hope) will be made. Would it be okay to say Thank You Ga! and Merry Christmas in advance? =)